You have resided with me for 8+ months now. Although you are an invited guest, I feel you have taken advantage of my hospitality. You play tetherball with my bladder and other vital organs. You have most of the day to move around, but you are most active when I am trying to get some sleep. But worst of all are your random acts of digestive violence. One expects these things in the first trimester, but it is week 36. Really, I shouldn't have to pull over at a gas station to puke during my 10-minute drive home from the grocery store. This arrangement isn't working for me anymore.
Consider this a warning. You have 30 days to vacate the premises. If you do not choose to leave voluntarily, I am sending my doctor in, armed with pitocin.
PS. I look forward to a more amicable living situation when you are residing in a crib.